You do not sleep alone.
You don't know it,
But those times when you miss me most
Are the times I am with you most.
I pray to God
That you would be able to feel my arms around you
As you lie there,
The way I can feel you:
As I lay in bed,
All I have to do is close my eyes,
And I can feel your motionless weight
Draped across me,
Sometimes so real that I reach out my hand
In the dark
To see if you somehow actually materialized there.
The closer I get to sleep,
The more real you become,
Until I can smell your hair,
Feel the warm stir of your breath
Against my cheek.
If your presence were truly physical,
I would be in unspeakable torment,
Unable to do anything more
Than just feel you against me,
And occasionally touch your hair.
It is no torment.
Rather, it is a great comfort,
And so I know that it is your spirit,
Not your body,
That draws near at night.
You don't have to believe me,
But I know that when we are both asleep,
We are together.
The moment we drift off to sleep
Is the moment our spirits awake
In each other's presence.
I have known this as long as I can remember.
I used to think that we talked,
Laughing at our silly infatuations
With other people in the waking world.
I thought that when we awoke,
We forgot everything about the encounter,
And the next night either remembered again,
Or made our shy introductions anew.
I think now that it is less of a conversation,
And more of a mingling,
A union between us.
I know this:
My spirit knows yours.
We have been destined for one another since time began.
Never doubt, either that we will find each other.
Someday we will meet, if we haven't already.
We will grow closer in friendship,
And then in love.
Someday I will propose to you
In the most beautiful place in the world
(Never doubt that, I know exactly where it is).
You will say yes,
And God only knows the wonderful things
In store for the both of us after that.
So take comfort as you lay there.
Close your eyes.
My arms already encircle you.
Remember this as you fall asleep
With your head on my chest:
You do not sleep alone.
We will come together someday.
Until we find each other,
Wait patiently,
Watch for me,
And don't give your heart away to just anyone.
I alone can be trusted with that treasure.
-J.R. Willett